The term doula is thought to come from ancient Greece, and referred to women supporting each other during child birth. This role was often performed by female slaves, which makes the term somewhat controversial. Some people prefer to use other terms such as companion, support person, or steward. My choice to use the term doula is in part because it is becoming a more common way to identify this aspect of my work in the world, and also as a way to honor the doulas of the past who may not have been recognized with reverence as they supported countless humans in birth and in death.

The idea of doulas being of support solely for the birthing process has evolved into postpartum care, death care, and many other transitional moments throughout one’s life. Death doulas, birth doulas, full spectrum doulas, or doulas of any kind do not take the place of medical care, and do not administer medication. Rather, we are here to hold space and offer logistical, informational, emotional, and spiritual support as desired by the the client and the community throughout the many phases of living and dying.

Doula's help to navigate the space between, as well as the space before and after.  We offer a stable presence within the delicate container of transitional space. We are not afraid of discomfort, and approach both life and death with wonder and compassionate curiosity.

A death doula can offer essential, non-medical support beyond the availability of hospice or palliative care. I work in collaboration with your hospice and medical team to provide you with full spectrum, client centered care. As a death doula, I spend time with you to help you figure out what you want, and advocate for you when desired or necessary. Our work can also include support in post-death planning, ritual making, and all of the tasks involved in "wrapping up affairs" after someone has died. I support the dying person as well as the circle of support or caregivers that surround the dying person.

We plan for many events within a single lifetime, so why not plan for death? If you are reading this, you will die someday. This fact is inevitable. When we talk about death, plan for our own death, or plan for the death of someone we care about, we are able to live more fully into this life.

On a practical note, having plans in place for our own eventual death is a huge gift to those who will be left to care for us in the dying process and responsible for decisions after we are dead. Planning for your own death is a kind, generous, and loving act. It is a way to let people know what you want, who you want to act on your behalf, and can help to minimize painful family or community conflict that often arises in the face of death.

On a personal and emotional level, I believe that talking about and thinking about our own death, is a powerful tool to gain insight on relationships, love, fear, and how we be or want to be in the world as we continue to live. I have seen death centered conversations transform people's lives and become a source for deep healing. I have, and continue to experience the profoundly healing effects of creating space at the table for death, and welcome you to join me on this journey.

If you've come to this page, you likely think you need help, and I would be honored to assist you.  If the person you care about doesn't die as a result of this current illness, while that is likely wonderful news, I assure you they will die someday.  Just like me, and just like you.  I work with people in all phases of living and dying, and in any stage of health and wellness.

Yes!  I offer in-person services in and around "The Triangle" in Central North Carolina.  I live in Carrboro and work with folks in Carrboro, Chapel Hill, Durham, Hillsborough, Pittsboro, Raleigh, and the surrounding towns.  Depending on distance, we may need to factor driving time and expenses into our financial commitment.

The short answer is, if I did not also offer services as an āyurvedic health counselor, you would likely never know that the practices were part of my life. They only enter our work together if you want them to. And the longer answer....

My experience with āyurveda influences everything about me. I connect to myself and the world around me through the lens of the five elements. I believe that the body, mind, and spirit are interconnected and that what affects one, affects the other. My spiritual self-care practices are what allow me to show up well for you and your people in an intentional and sustainable way. Though the principles of āyurveda and yoga philosophy are at the heart of how I care for my own being, I do not expect you to view the world from the same lens or share my beliefs. If you are interested in incorporating āyurveda into our work together, we can do that, but that is not the basis of our work together. Learn more about my work as an āyurvedic health counselor.

If finances are a barrier, please don't hesitate to get in touch so we can evaluate your needs and my availability. My work in the world is rooted in community. I believe that self care is community care, that death care is community care, and that community care is life care. If we can find a way to work together  that's mutually beneficial and helps to create the world we want to live in, I'm willing to explore options with you.  Please reach out after reading The Sliding Scale, and let me know what's coming up for you.

I'm glad you asked, thank you! You can offer a Contribution In Gratitude, which supports me in offering free and sliding scale services to the community.  Everyone deserves to be cared for and honored, in life and in death, and very few of us get that.  As with most wellness and medical services, those with more money have more access and receive a higher quality of care.  Your contribution helps break down barriers of inequity and makes this sacred work accessible to everyone, while allowing me to meet my own needs in the process.  From the depths of my heart, I thank you for your support.